KonoSuba: God's Blessing on This Wonderful World! ~Darkness' Secret Ledger~ - The True Diary and Unreachable Feelings

Her heart gave a sudden, violent thump. Deep in her chest, heat bloomed. Her breathing grew shallow. "Ahh, Kazuma... more, insult me more...! With those cold eyes of yours, look at me...!" In her own bedroom, bathed in the morning light. She — Dustiness Ford Lalatina, though everyone called her Darkness — lay on her bed, clutching the sheets tight as her body trembled and twitched. Her head was full of worthless fantasies. Kazuma, the party leader. That boy with the slightly mean eyes who was always complaining, yet somehow reliable when it counted — in her mind, he was swinging a whip at her. "Hey, you useless pervert knight." "Ahh, yes! I am a useless pervert...!" Yes, scorn me more! Because I'm a failure of a Crusader! ...And that was as far as her thoughts went. She let out a long, heavy sigh. Her arms flopped limply to the sides as she stared up at the ceiling. (...What am I even doing?) The Kazuma in her fantasy vanished instantly. In his place, his real, usual exasperated face surfaced in her mind. Yes, all of this — it was nothing but fantasy. She sat up and slipped a loose white blouse over her bare skin. She tied her long blonde hair, which reached all the way to her waist, up into a high ponytail. This was the usual her. Outside the window, the town of Axel stretched out before her. A city of novice adventurers, lined with stone buildings. A population of about fifteen thousand, enclosed by great walls. In the center stood the Adventurer's Guild, its tavern always bustling with adventurers searching for quests. Everyone was dreaming of striking it rich. The mansion she lived in was in the southeastern district of town — a former noble's villa that they had bought. She shared it with Kazuma, Aqua, and Megumin, the four of them living together. It had been about a year since she came here, she thought. The trigger had been her family's tradition. The Dustiness family was one of the most prominent high-ranking noble houses in the Belzerg region. And the head's daughter had to be engaged to a partner approved by the family by the age of twenty-five. The partner had to be a noble, a knight, or an adventurer of Rank B or higher. Such a ridiculous rule. If she broke it, she couldn't inherit the family headship. Her assets, her territory — all of it, gone. (It's not like I particularly want money or status, but...) Even so, she hated the thought of losing her freedom. Being forced into a political marriage with some old noble she didn't know — just imagining it made her sick. That was when she spotted Kazuma in town. A scrawny, black-haired boy with eyes like a dead fish. He'd formed a party that did odd jobs, dragging along a useless goddess named Aqua and an explosion-obsessed girl from the Crimson Demon Clan, and they caused chaos every single day. She fell for him at first sight. It wasn't logical. It was just that being around him made her chest tighten. Even for a masochist like her, feeling her heart pound without any pain was a first. So she joined his party. She said they needed a shield, and forced her way in. There was a calculation behind it, too. Kazuma's adventurer rank was, she believed, E or D. But if she acted as the shield and Megumin handled the offense, they could take on harder quests. If his rank went up, he could become her husband. That was what she'd thought. Reality, however, far exceeded her expectations. "Darkness, it's already morning." From the bottom of the stairs came that familiar, slightly irritated voice. The fantasy from moments ago flashed back through her mind, and her face turned red. Mornings at the Guild were always noisy. The Adventurer's Guild — a two-story stone building where people seeking quests in this town gathered. The first floor doubled as a tavern, and the smell of beer and cheap set meals hung in the air all day. In front of the wooden bulletin board, they were searching for today's quest. "Giant Toads again, huh..." Kazuma stared at a piece of parchment with a disgusted look. As he scratched his slightly unruly black hair, his short green cloak fluttered softly. He was much shorter than her, around 165 centimeters. But lately, she felt his eyes had gotten just a little sharper. "Five thousand eris a day. Not worth it for just one. Think we can handle three?" "Hmph, small fry. Before my Explosion magic, a Toad is no more than a tadpole!" Beside her, puffing out her small chest, was Megumin. Black hair that reached her shoulders, a large black robe and a pointed hat. And the proof of her Crimson Demon Clan heritage — eyes of the deepest crimson. The Crimson Demon Clan was a race born with high magical power, with only about two thousand of them on the entire continent. Among them, Megumin was an especially talented Archwizard, capable of using the highest-tier Explosion magic. However, only once a day. After using it, she could barely even stand. "Yeah, but you always collapse after one shot." "Kazuma, you do not understand the value of my ultimate magic." Darkness watched their exchange with a faint pang of envy. On the outskirts of the Ash Tree Forest, in a grassy plain. "GERO GERO OOOOH!" A giant frog, three meters long, lunged straight at her. "Come, then! I shall be your shield — kyaaah!" She'd done it on purpose. On purpose, she insisted. The Toad's thick tongue wrapped around her torso, armor and all. Her vision warped and twisted as she was dragged into its foul-smelling mouth. (Ahh, this sensation... this suffocating pressure...!) Sticky mucus seeped through the gaps in her armor, soiling her skin with its slime. She couldn't breathe. The crushing pressure felt as if her whole body might dissolve. (This is terrible... so terribly good...!) "Aaaah! This humiliation of being licked all over...! I can't bear it, and yet this exhilaration...!" What escaped her lips was a scream mingling pleasure and pain. "Again, you idiot knight?!" From far away, she heard Megumin's exasperated voice. "Explosion!" In an instant, the world was swallowed by light. A roar. An impact. The Toad's body vaporized in a flash, and Darkness was slammed into the ground. A radius of two hundred meters. That was the area of effect of Megumin's Explosion magic. The vegetation was flattened, the ground gouged out like a crater. "Cough... Y-you...!" "Shut up! And stop deliberately getting yourself eaten every single time! What's the point of a shield, then?!" Megumin had used up all her magic and was sitting slumped on the spot. She apparently couldn't move. Even so, her red eyes glared firmly at Darkness. "Good grief... Darkness, you really are a pervert. Before being a shield, try becoming a human being." Kazuma, too, looked exasperated as he spoke, stripping spoils from the dead Toad. "...Yeah, sorry." She apologized, but somewhere in her heart, she felt a little happy. Because Kazuma was complaining about her, just like always. It was only at times like this that she could believe he still saw her as a comrade. On the way back from the quest. The sun was beginning to set, and long shadows stretched through the forest. "So, if you don't wanna die young like some old man, try acting a bit more like a shield." "I-I know that..." Kazuma, grumbling as usual, walked ahead with the immobilized Megumin on his back. Darkness lagged a little behind the two of them, trudging slowly. The Toad's slime still clung to the gaps in her armor. It was disgusting, yet somehow, it felt pleasant. (If this were from Kazuma...) Another strange fantasy nearly crossed her mind. She shook her head vigorously, as if to shake it off. That was when it happened. Without noticing the tree root at her feet, she tripped hard. "Kyaaah!?" She tumbled down the slope, sliding and rolling. Her back armor clanged against rocks and branches, sending jolts of pain through her. "O-oww... Where am I?" She stood up and looked around. The path from before was nowhere to be seen. Deep trees surrounded her. Much, much deeper into the Ash Tree Forest. A place even the locals rarely entered. (I'm completely lost, aren't I?) Suppressing her panic, she examined her surroundings carefully. Then, in a small clearing, she found it. A small, moss-covered stone shrine. About three meters tall. The entrance was two meters wide, and inside was dark. It sat there quietly, as if calling out to her. "The Shrine of Fruv..." For some reason, the name surfaced in her mind. Even though she had never heard it before. As if drawn in, she stepped into the shrine, and cool air caressed her skin. It was just barely bright enough to see, lit only by the light spilling in from outside. In the center stood a single stone altar. And on top of it — an old book had been placed. "The Diary of Truth." A leather-bound book, slightly larger than her palm. She reached out her hand. The moment her finger touched the cover. The book glowed with a pale, blue-white light. "Wha—!" Numbers flooded into her head. [Kazuma → Darkness Affection: 55] [Trust: 60] [Romantic Feelings: 15] The numbers seared themselves into the back of her mind. "Fi-fifty... five." Her limbs trembled. As a friend, so-so. Trust — it seemed he trusted her somewhat. But romantic feelings: fifteen. (That's practically zero, isn't it?) She couldn't breathe. She'd known. She'd known, but having it thrust before her in numbers — it hit her this hard. Megumin was seventy. Even Aqua was sixty-five. (I'm... the lowest.) Tears welled up, blurring her vision. At that moment, a page of the book fluttered open, independent of her will. A pure white page. But she felt as though she could write something there. (These numbers... I can change them?) Her instincts whispered it to her. She could manipulate emotions. She could rewrite a person's heart. This was a forbidden item. Ancient letters carved into the shrine's wall. She shouldn't have been able to read them, yet somehow, their meaning entered her mind. 'Uncompensated falsification shall, in time, erode the writer's own heart.' (Something like that...) She clutched the book tightly to her chest. Her armor was cold, and the sound of her heartbeat was terribly loud. (Something like that doesn't matter.) If things stayed like this, she would end up as nothing more than the perverted party member. Kazuma would never think anything of her, and she would be married off to some unknown noble. She refused to let that happen. Back in her room at the mansion, she opened the diary by the light of a single candle. Her feelings for Kazuma overflowed, unstoppable. "Why... why only me...?" The family tradition. The position she had to uphold. And a love that would never be returned. Everything weighed heavily on her, and she cried, stifling her voice. (All I wanted... was just to be with Kazuma.) On the page blurred by tears, she placed her finger, filled with resolve. (Just a little. Just a tiny bit is fine. Make Kazuma aware of me.) Beneath her finger, the numbers seemed to glow faintly. (With this, finally... my love can begin.) That night, the town of Axel quietly grew late. Bundling together her tiny hope for Kazuma and her immense guilt, she gently closed the diary.

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Episode 1

Name: KonoSuba: God's Blessing on This Wonderful World! ~Darkness' Secret Ledger~
Author: Novelia

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