KILL la KILL IF: The World Where Senketsu Didn't Burn Out
A half year has passed since the final battle in space—since Senketsu burned away, leaving Ryuuko with nothing but a scrap of memory and a father's Scissor Blade. She drifts through an ordinary high school, doodling a black sailor uniform in the margins of her notebook, skipping class to chase rumors, and shutting out the friend who keeps texting to ask if she's alive.
Then a letter arrives in her shoe locker, written in round, bubbly handwriting she'll never forget: Harime Nui is alive, Senket
KILL la KILL IF: The World Where Senketsu Didn't Burn Out - Ward of Nothingness — The Lost Arm, the Shattered Heart, Nui's Poisonous Fangs
The air in the abandoned hospital was cold through and through.
The window glass was still shattered. Gray concrete showed through where the wallpaper had peeled away. The smell of disinfectant mixed with mold and rusted iron, heavy enough to cling to the back of her lungs.
Ryuuko woke in that cold air.
The ceiling. A white, sterile ceiling. Familiar, and yet not. This was the place she'd been brought half a year ago, several times, when she was injured. The abandoned hospital that Mako's father secretly used.
(...Yeah. That's right.)
Her memories returned slowly. Ragyo's research wing. The underground lab. The operating table. Nui's smile. Thread blades. Shielding Mako—
(My arm.)
Ryuuko looked down at her left arm.
From the shoulder down, it was gone.
Bandages were wrapped around and around it. Beneath the white cloth, something was simply... missing. The weight that should have been there wasn't. She tried to move her fingers. Nothing moved.
"...Ah."
Her voice came out. Even she was surprised by how dry it sounded.
(My arm is gone.)
Her mind understood. But her body, her heart, refused it. Because it had been there just moments ago. With this arm she'd swung the Scissor Blades. With this arm she'd shoved Mako out of the way. This arm had—
"...Ah. Ah."
Ryuuko grabbed her left shoulder with her right hand. Hard, through the bandages. There was no pain. Numb, maybe—the sensation was far away.
(Senketsu's gone too.)
She clenched her right hand in front of her chest. That warm feeling wasn't there. The slightly stiff fabric of the black sailor uniform. Senketsu's voice.
(I've lost everything.)
Her arm. Senketsu. And the obvious fact that she was human.
Nui's words echoed in her head.
"You're not human. You're a weapon made of Life Fibers, built to kill people."
(I'm a weapon.)
Ryuuko's lips trembled.
(A weapon built to kill people.)
Heat welled behind her eyes. Her vision blurred. The ceiling looked warped.
(Like I care.)
She covered her eyes with her right hand.
(I'm me. I'm human.)
But deep down, another self whispered.
(Is that really true?)
Ryuuko's shoulders began to tremble in small spasms.
(If you gouged out my heart, would Life Fibers come out instead of blood?)
(What am I?)
(Who am I?)
"...Damn it."
It was a strangled voice.
"Damn it... damn it!"
Ryuuko struck her own head with her right hand. Her temple, again and again. Trying to beat the thoughts into silence with pain.
(I can't fight anymore.)
(Senketsu's gone. My arm's gone. I have nothing.)
"...Nothing at all."
Her voice was wet with tears.
Ryuuko cried, muffling the sound. Shoulders shaking, teeth gritted, voiceless sobs escaping her. Tears ran down her cheeks and soaked the pillow.
(I'm finished.)
That was when it happened.
"Ryuuko-chan!"
Mako burst through the doorway. Her messy brown short hair flew wild, and her big round black eyes were swollen bright red. In her arms she clutched a paper bag.
"Ryuuko-chan! You're awake! Thank goodness... really, thank goodness...!"
Mako rushed to the bed and seized Ryuuko's right hand in both of hers. Her hands were warm, a little sweaty.
"I've been waiting this whole time! Until you woke up, Ryuuko-chan, I was right here the whole, whole time!"
Mako's tears splashed down onto Ryuuko's hand.
Ryuuko looked at Mako's face.
(...She's crying again.)
(Because of me.)
(Because I couldn't protect her.)
"...Leave me alone."
Ryuuko shook off Mako's hands.
"Ryuuko-chan...?"
Mako pulled her hands back, bewildered.
"You can see for yourself. I can't fight anymore. I don't even have the right to be with you. ...Get out of here."
Ryuuko turned her face away from Mako, toward the wall. Beyond the broken window, the overcast sky hung heavy and low.
"What are you saying, Ryuuko-chan! I don't think that at all! You protected me, Ryuuko-chan—that's why I'm still here! You're my lifesaver!"
Mako's voice was shaking. Even so, she kept hurling words at Ryuuko's back.
"No matter what you look like, Ryuuko-chan, I'm your friend! I decided I'd stay by your side forever, and I meant it!"
Ryuuko didn't answer.
She just stared at the old calendar on the wall. The date was still from half a year ago. A room where time had stopped.
(Maybe my time's stopped too.)
"...Ryuuko-chan, you're hungry, right? I brought croquettes—your favorite, Ryuuko-chan! From that butcher shop in the shopping district! Let's eat together?"
The rustle of the paper bag. The faint drift of oil and sauce from the croquettes.
(...I'm not hungry.)
(I don't want to eat anything.)
Ryuuko closed her eyes.
"...Ryuuko-chan."
Mako's small voice dissolved into the quiet room.
How much time had passed?
Ryuuko had her eyes open. Staring at the ceiling, just vaguely.
(I can't sleep.)
(If I sleep, I'll dream.)
(That dream of underground.)
A sharp tap.
Someone was knocking on the window glass.
Ryuuko turned her head slowly.
Beyond the broken window. Against the overcast sky, pale pink hair swayed softly.
It was Harime Nui.
"Yoo-hoo, Ryuuko-chan. You survived! Good, good."
Nui sat perched on the windowsill, as if it were the best seat in the house. Beneath the bangs hiding her left eye, her big blue eye was laughing. On her fingertips, fingerless gloves. And in those fingers, she toyed with something.
A scrap of red cloth.
A fragment of Senketsu's right eye.
"...You!"
Ryuuko sat up in the bed. Her right hand clenched the sheets.
"Aha, don't glare at me like that. Scary. ...Hey, Ryuuko-chan. I heard your arm's gone? Poor thing. But it's fine, right? Because you're not human, Ryuuko-chan. An arm or two will grow right back, won't it?"
Nui's words seeped into her heart like poison.
"...What do you want?"
Ryuuko's voice was hoarse.
"What do you mean, what? I'm here to visit! To check on the arm I cut off. ...And also, I thought I'd tell you something interesting."
Nui twirled the fragment of Senketsu on her index finger. The red light flickered eerily under the overcast sky.
"Ryuuko-chan, what do you think of Satsuki-san?"
Ryuuko didn't answer.
"You think of her as your big sister, don't you? You trust her, don't you? Fufu, how cute."
Nui smiled brightly and peered into Ryuuko's face.
"But you know, Ryuuko-chan. Satsuki-san was only using you from the very start."
Ryuuko's heart jumped.
"...What are you saying?"
"Satsuki-san knew all along that you were a weapon fused with Life Fibers. She knew, and she tried to make you a pawn in her ambition. ...While hiding your true nature from you."
Nui's voice was sweet, coiling into the depths of her ears.
"You believed she was your sister, didn't you? But to her, you're just a tool. A convenient weapon who can wear Senketsu. ...Aha, it's really hilarious. Every time I see you desperately clinging to your big sister, big sister, it makes me laugh so hard my stomach knots up."
"Liar!"
Ryuuko was shouting.
"Nee-san would never do that! Nee-san is my only family!"
"Ahahahaha! Family! Family, she says! Hey, Ryuuko-chan, are you listening? That 'family' of yours is the daughter of the woman who made you a lab rat! Blood will tell, you know?"
Nui's laughter echoed through the hospital room.
"...You remember what was done to you in Ragyo's research wing, don't you? On that operating table, what did you think? Who sent you there? Who turned you into a weapon?"
Ryuuko's breathing grew ragged.
(No.)
(Nee-san isn't that kind of person.)
(Nee-san saved me.)
(...But.)
(Is that really true?)
(What does Nee-san know about me?)
"...It's fine if you don't believe me. You can go confirm it yourself. ...Ah, but with that arm, maybe you can't even do that."
Nui waved the fragment of Senketsu back and forth toward Ryuuko.
"You want this back? Then do your best to survive. ...See you, Ryuuko-chan. Get well soon."
Nui lightly dropped from the windowsill.
Her pale pink hair vanished into the overcast sky.
Silence returned to the room.
Ryuuko lay on the bed, staring blankly up at the ceiling.
(Nee-san... used me...?)
Nui's words spun round and round in her head.
(Using me...?)
(I'm a tool...?)
"...It's a lie."
Ryuuko's voice faded, hoarse.
"Ryuuko-chan! Was that Harime Nui just now!? What did she do to you!?"
Mako came flying into the room. She must have gone out to buy things—she was clutching a plastic water bottle.
"Ryuuko-chan, are you okay!? Are you hurt anywhere!? Did that woman take anything!?"
Mako touched Ryuuko all over, checking.
"...I'm fine."
Ryuuko answered shortly.
"...Ryuuko-chan, you're pale as a ghost. ...What did she say to you? Tell me, Ryuuko-chan."
Mako took Ryuuko's hand.
Ryuuko didn't shake it off.
"...She said Nee-san was using me."
Ryuuko murmured quietly.
"What!? Satsuki-san!? That can't be true! Satsuki-san is your big sister, Ryuuko-chan! She was so worried about you!"
"...You wouldn't understand."
Ryuuko looked up at the ceiling again.
(I don't understand.)
(I don't understand either.)
(What's true, what's a lie.)
"I do understand! I get it! Satsuki-san would never use you, Ryuuko-chan! Because you're family! I know! That's what family means!"
Mako's voice was shaking. Even so, she looked straight at Ryuuko.
Ryuuko said nothing.
She just kept staring at the ceiling with hollow eyes.
Evening came.
Beyond the overcast sky, the sun was beginning to set. The hospital room was dim, wrapped in blue shadows.
Mako had set up a small folding chair beside Ryuuko's bed and sat there.
"Hey, Ryuuko-chan! Look at this! I brought all kinds of things so you wouldn't get bored!"
Mako pulled things out of a big bag one after another.
"First, this! My favorite cat plushie! And then, this! A sparkly sticker I won in the shopping district raffle! And this is a rice ball my mom made for you, Ryuuko-chan! It's got pickled plum in it!"
Mako briskly lined them up on the bed.
"And then, and then! Listen, Ryuuko-chan! Today, my little brother Mataro got another love letter from a girl at school! And you know what Mataro did? He used the love letter to blow his nose! Ahaha, terrible, right! Mom got mad and made him kneel on the floor!"
Mako laughed all by herself.
Ryuuko watched silently.
"Oh, and also, Dad was airing futons on the hospital roof yesterday, and the wind blew one off and it landed smack on the neighbor's doghouse! The dog got so startled it barked and barked—what a mess! Ahahaha!"
Mako's laughter rang through the quiet hospital room.
"...See, Ryuuko-chan? Isn't this fun? I'll keep telling you funny stories like this until you smile, Ryuuko-chan!"
Mako smiled brightly.
Ryuuko looked at Mako's face.
(...How can she stay so bright?)
(When I'm this dark.)
(When I couldn't protect her.)
"...Why?"
Ryuuko's lips moved.
"Huh?"
"...Why are you so strong?"
Ryuuko's voice was small and hoarse.
"I'm not strong. I'm not strong at all. ...It's just that you matter to me, Ryuuko-chan. Just having you here makes me happy."
Mako said that and smiled.
It was a smile like the sun.
Heat welled behind Ryuuko's eyes.
Her vision blurred.
"...Idiot."
Ryuuko turned her face away.
A single tear traced down her cheek.
(...She matters to me too.)
(That's why it hurts even more.)
(When I'm this useless.)
Ryuuko bit her lip and held back the tears.
Night came.
Mako had collapsed beside the bed, exhausted, and fallen asleep.
Ryuuko couldn't sleep, and stared at the ceiling.
(...I have to sleep.)
(If I don't sleep, my body won't hold up.)
(But if I sleep, I'll dream.)
(That dream of underground.)
Ryuuko slowly closed her eyes.
Fatigue rushed over her all at once.
Her consciousness sank into the dark, deep darkness.
—Ryuuko.
A voice.
A familiar voice.
—Ryuuko. Wake up.
"...Senketsu...?"
In the darkness, Ryuuko reached toward the voice.
—You're not finished yet.
"...Senketsu... where are you...? Where are you...?"
—I'm here. Inside you. Always, together with you.
"...Inside me...
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