KonoSuba: If Aqua Was Actually a Goddess - The Depths of Loneliness and Fading Memories

The stone pavement of the fountain plaza was damp with night dew. Kazuma sat on its edge, unable to move. Aqua was gone. That aqua-blue hair, that noisy voice—nowhere to be found. Since bolting out of the inn last night, they had run all over town. The back alleys of the market, in front of the tavern "Vittel's Barrel," beneath the guild's bulletin board—she was nowhere. (Where the hell did she go...) In their hand was the blue ribbon Aqua had dropped. Their fingers, clutching it, were numb from the morning chill. "Hey, isn't that Kazuma?" A low voice reached them. Looking up, several familiar adventurers were pointing their way. The moment their eyes met, the onlookers quickly averted their gazes. One of them made a show of keeping his distance as he walked off. "I heard they've got a cursed sword. Don't get close." "They say they called the Demon King's army here... It's their fault this town's in danger." The pit of Kazuma's stomach went cold. What the hell? What did I even do? Grim Edge was a sword they'd taken from a bandit gang. How did that turn into summoning the Demon King's army? "Hey, wait. I didn't do anything—" They stood to chase after them, but the adventurers were already hurrying away. Their backs grew smaller and smaller. No one looked back. (Damn it...) Kazuma clenched their fist. Between their fingers, the aqua-blue ribbon crinkled softly. The fountain's water sparkled, reflecting the morning sun. That light was painfully bright. --- The moment Kazuma pushed open the door of the Nornvice Adventurers' Guild, the air went taut. Adventurers who would normally be chatting away from morning on fell dead silent the instant they saw Kazuma. (Ah, so that's how it is.) Kazuma walked straight to the reception desk. Luna, the receptionist with silver hair tied back, fixed Kazuma with tired, sharp eyes. "Kazuma-san. We need to talk. This way." Luna's voice was lower than usual. Once seated in the cramped chair of the meeting room, Luna placed a single sheet of paper on the desk. "Regarding the magic sword in your possession, the Adventurers' Guild will conduct a formal inquiry. How you obtained it, your intended use, and—why that sword was brought into this city. Please tell us everything, honestly." "Wait. I got that sword as spoils of war at a bandit hideout. I didn't know anything—I just—" "'Didn't know anything' isn't going to cut it." Luna folded her fingers and stared steadily at Kazuma. "Right now, a rumor is spreading through Axel that 'an adventurer who brought in a cursed sword has summoned the Demon King's army.' There's no basis for it. But people are afraid. And an adventurer who's in debt and hasn't even submitted a repayment plan—their credibility is—" "You're bringing up the debt now?" Kazuma's voice rose. "That's got nothing to do with this! I haven't done anything wrong!" Luna quietly shook her head. "Kazuma-san. I'm not saying you're at fault. But the Guild cannot simply ignore the rumors. Grim Edge will be temporarily held by the Guild." "Held...? I tried to throw that sword away. But no matter what I do, it comes right back. Can you even hold onto it?" Luna frowned for a moment. "...Understood. I will consult a specialist in sealing magic. Until then, you are confined to your residence. Quest acceptance is suspended. Please understand." Kazuma tried to say something. But the words wouldn't come. --- By the time they left the guild, the sky was already high. Their stomach was empty, but they had no appetite. Walking through town, passersby glanced their way and edged to the side of the road. It was as if Kazuma had become a walking plague. (A jinx, huh.) Kazuma let out a self-deprecating laugh. ...No, "self-deprecating" was too fancy a word for it. It was just a twitching smile plastered to the corner of their mouth. Their feet, naturally, were searching for Aqua. Through the market, down the main street. The fruit vendor, a man who'd normally call out "Hey, Kazuma, how's it going today," pointedly turned his face away the moment he noticed them. "...You've gotta be kidding me." Their voice came out hoarse. By the time the eastern sky began to stain orange, Kazuma was standing in a back alley. A small stone building. On its wall was carved the crest of water. The Axis Cult's Axel mission house—the place Aqua had proudly called "my followers' base." They circled around to the back. A narrow vacant lot overgrown with weeds. And— There she was. Aqua-blue hair, lit by the setting sun, glowing faintly blue. Aqua was huddled against the wall, hugging her knees. Her usual midriff-baring outfit was stained with dirt, her hair disheveled. "Aqua." At the sound of their voice, Aqua's shoulders flinched. "...Kazuma." Aqua didn't look up. Face buried in her knees, she murmured quietly. "I'm sorry. I... I can't face you, Kazuma." "What are you talking about? I've been looking for you. I ran all over town. Because you weren't there—" "I spent all of Kazuma's money. And that's not all—people said terrible things to me. And because of me, even you... I'm sorry. I'm so sorry." Aqua's voice was trembling. Kazuma crouched down in front of her. "It's fine. The money doesn't matter anymore. More importantly—why are you here?" "...I met Seijoa Aqua." Kazuma's breath stopped for a moment. "That night, I was walking through town when a light came down. And then she—Seijoa Aqua—told me. The power to save Kazuma can only be obtained in exchange for my memories." Aqua slowly raised her face. Her blue eyes were brimming with tears. "Kazuma. I want to be useful to you." "What are you—" "You're always making fun of me. But even so, you stay with me. When I lost everything at the casino, you got angry, and then... But I've never been able to give anything back to you. I'm always just causing trouble." Aqua's voice was wet, wavering. "So if I offer up my memories, and Kazuma can become strong—if that makes Kazuma smile, then I'll gladly give these memories away." "Don't be stupid!" Kazuma was shouting. The air around them seemed to tremble. "Offer up your memories? So I can get stronger? Why are you trying to accept a condition like that?! Do you even understand what you're saying?!" "I do understand!" Aqua screamed back through her tears. "I understand. That's why I'm saying it! I want to be useful to Kazuma. I've always felt that way. Kazuma helps me. Protects me. But I—I can't do anything. Because I don't have any power." "You don't need power!" "Yes I do!" Aqua clung to Kazuma's chest. Her small body was terribly hot. The sound of her heartbeat came through their clothes. Fast. Pained. That kind of sound. "I want to go on adventures with Kazuma. Fight, laugh, eat yakitori—forever. But for that, this useless body of mine isn't enough. So—" Aqua looked up. Her face was a mess of tears and snot. Even so, those blue eyes stared straight at Kazuma. "Please. Don't reject this choice of mine." Kazuma couldn't say anything. They just held Aqua's trembling shoulders tightly. I never wanted a day like this to come. I'd always thought—Aqua making noise, messing up, piling up debt, me snapping at her. That cycle would just keep going, like it was natural. (Can I really do nothing?) The two of them stayed like that behind the mission house, holding each other, watching the sun sink below the horizon. --- That night, a light descended in front of the inn. Not moonlight—something faint, yet vivid. A pale blue-white glow. The night became bright as day. From within the light, Seijoa Aqua appeared. The same aqua-blue hair as the useless Aqua. But this hair didn't wave—it was perfectly neat, shining as if haloed. Deep azure eyes slowly regarded Kazuma and Aqua. "Kazuma-san. And me—no, Aqua-san." Seijoa Aqua's voice resonated quietly through the night air. "There is no time. The Demon King's army led by Beldia will invade Axel tomorrow. The city will be engulfed in terror. And, Kazuma-san—to grant you the blessing of 'Deadly Joke'—" Seijoa Aqua's gaze turned to Aqua. "There is no choice but to take her memories as the price." "Wait! Why—isn't there another way?! I'll offer something in her place! Take my memories, or anything—just take it!" Kazuma stood shielding Aqua behind them, shouting at Seijoa Aqua. Seijoa Aqua smiled sadly. "That is not possible. This blessing can only be established when 'a goddess relinquishes her own memories.' Your memories cannot serve as a substitute." "That's just... too cruel..." Kazuma clenched their fists. Their back teeth ground audibly from the force of their jaw. "Kazuma." Aqua stepped forward, out from behind Kazuma's back. "It's okay. I've made up my mind." "Aqua, are you insane? Your memories will disappear. You might forget me—forget everything!" "I remember. That just now, Kazuma tried to protect me. I remember that, properly." Aqua looked up at Kazuma. Her tears had already dried. "Kazuma. I love your smiling face." Aqua said it, and smiled. It was her usual smile, like a flower blooming. But Kazuma understood, painfully, how much pain was hidden behind that smile. Seijoa Aqua stepped toward Aqua. "Aqua-san. As a goddess, I am proud of your courage." Seijoa Aqua's white fingers touched Aqua's forehead. In that instant— Particles of light burst from Aqua's body. Like a fountain of stars, aqua-blue light surged upward. That light touched Kazuma's cheek too. It was warm light. But Kazuma's heart was like ice. "Stop... please stop...! Aqua!" Kazuma screamed, reaching out. But a wall of light gently blocked them. Their fingertips touched the light—and were repelled. The light eventually settled quietly, and from Aqua's forehead, the last particle vanished into the night sky. Aqua stood there. Eyes closed. "...It is done. From today, her memories will vanish one by one, each day." Seijoa Aqua's voice quietly announced the end. Kazuma collapsed to their knees on the spot. "...Why did you..." The tears wouldn't stop. They fell to the ground, forming dark stains. "Kazuma-san." Seijoa Aqua softly approached. "In the memories I borrowed from Aqua-san just now, there was so much laughter shared with you. To her, your smile is light itself. Please, continue to make her laugh. For that is the only light that can hold her fading memories together." With those parting words, Seijoa Aqua vanished with the light. Night returned. --- Morning. Kazuma sat beside Aqua in a room at the inn. Morning light streamed through the window, illuminating Aqua's aqua-blue hair. Aqua's eyes fluttered open. "...Good morning...?" Aqua looked at Kazuma with a blank expression. "Morning, Aqua." Kazuma spoke as gently as they could. Aqua tilted her head. "...Um, ah, I'm sorry. Who are you?" Kazuma's heart was seized in a vice. (No. It's still okay. The memories have only just started fading. She's only forgotten my name.) "I'm Kazuma. Satou Kazuma. Just an adventurer who came to this world with you." Kazuma said it slowly. "Kazuma... Kazuma..." Aqua repeated the word over and over, as if tasting it. "...I'm sorry. I can't remember. Who is Kazuma? Why am I here? I'm sure I was... a goddess... Aqua... Huh? Why am I crying?" Tears slid down Aqua's cheeks. "You're Aqua. My partner. A useless goddess who's always racking up debt, throwing parties at the tavern, and getting yelled at by me." "Ah... ahh..." Aqua clutched her head with both hands. Her fingers tangled in her aqua-blue hair. "I don't understand... I don't understand... Kazuma, or myself... My head is completely blank... I'm sorry... I'm so sorry..." Aqua broke down crying. Shoulders shaking, she wept aloud. Kazuma held her. "Don't cry. It's okay. You're Aqua, and I'm Kazuma. I'll tell you as many times as it takes. No matter how many times you forget, I'll tell you again." "I'm sorry... I don't understand... Kazuma..

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Episode 5

Name: KonoSuba: If Aqua Was Actually a Goddess
Author: Novelia

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