I almost died today.
And in that last second—when my cursed energy ran dry and the dark finally closed in—it wasn't my family, my sensei, or my own life flashing before my eyes.
It was him. His profile under the vending machine light. His voice saying something I can't even remember the words to, just the warmth of it.
Hasaba Nale is a first-year jujutsu sorcerer who survives his first brush with a special-grade curse by inches, and comes back changed in a way he doesn't have a name for yet.
I Was Smiling Right Beside You - The redness of the face is not a cold.
The lecture hall for cursed technique theory was slanted with afternoon sunlight, and the temperature had settled into something drowsy.
Hasaba Nale sat three rows from the window, watching the blackboard. The instructor was a man in his fifties—his name was Wakisaka, if Nale remembered correctly. He had short salt-and-pepper hair, always wore a suit, and spoke in a flat, monotone voice. Without much emotional inflection, he was discussing cursed energy output data today.
"——Let's confirm each person's measurement results once more."
Wakisaka began writing numbers on the blackboard. The sound of chalk scraping was the only thing echoing through the room.
Nale straightened his posture.
There were five first-year students at Tokyo Jujutsu High in total. Their individual cursed energy output measurements appeared one by one next to their names. Cursed power—energy born from human negative emotions—quantified in both total volume and manipulation precision.
Fushiguro Megumi: Output 97, Manipulation Precision A.
Itadori Yuji: Output——listed as "outside reference range," with a parenthetical note reading "unmeasurable under standard measurement criteria."
Hasaba Nale: Output 68, Manipulation Precision B.
The numbers lined up on the blackboard. Nale stared at them.
68.
It wasn't bad. Wakisaka had said in a previous lecture that it was sufficient for exorcising grade-2 cursed spirits. But——Fushiguro's 97 existed three rows above that number.
"Regarding Itadori, since he falls outside the standard measurement framework, he will be handled separately."
Wakisaka said this while casually adding a note next to Itadori's entry. Nale already knew why Itadori's measurement was "outside reference range." That guy had something special dwelling inside him. The kind of thing the jujutsu world called "special grade."
"Any questions?"
No one raised their hand. Nale didn't either.
From the seat next to him, Itadori said something in a low voice.
"They told me my numbers aren't useful as reference data again"
His voice carried laughter. He didn't seem hurt at all. He was completely unbothered. This was so like him, Nale thought. He wasn't intoxicated by his own "specialness" at all. If anything, he seemed inconvenienced by it.
Nale kept facing forward and wrote the number 68 in his notebook.
As his pen moved, he thought vaguely.
The number 68 was the result of Nale's effort. He came from a non-prestigious background, and his cursed technique aptitude wasn't exceptional. Yet since entering, he'd trained every morning in the training grounds——nicknamed "the Box"——practicing physical combat and cursed energy manipulation, building up this number. It wasn't a shameful result.
But.
Every time Wakisaka's mouth formed the name "Fushiguro," something stirred in the depths of Nale's chest. A sensation he couldn't quite explain himself. Was it jealousy? Anxiety? Or something entirely different?
*(Will I be able to stay here?)*
That question surfaced sometimes, then sank again. He'd heard the graduation rate from the high school was around seventy percent. The remaining thirty percent: death, desertion, expulsion. Not vague numbers—actual things that happened in this world Nale had stepped into.
The class ended with the chime.
---
In the hallway, Nale was looking over his data notes. Outside the window, autumn trees were visible, their leaves beginning to shift color. Beyond the training grounds——the Box——he could see the thicket of mixed trees behind the school building.
He looked at the number 68 in his notebook one more time.
"Nale, don't make that difficult face"
He'd appeared beside him without warning. Itadori's voice came through clearly even in the hallway's noise. His black hair caught the light from the corridor. His face was smiling. Just like always.
"It's nothing"
"That's definitely a lie. Your eyes are making that face"
"What does it mean for eyes to make a face"
After pointing that out, the corner of his mouth lifted slightly. Talking to this guy did that to him. Without even realizing it.
Itadori tilted his head a little. It was hard to tell from his expression whether he was thinking or just pondering vending machines. Then, as naturally as if saying something completely ordinary——
"I don't really understand cursed techniques or anything. But when you're next to me, I feel at ease, you know?"
He started walking. Toward the cafeteria. Without looking back.
Nale couldn't move.
The hallway's noise seemed to recede. Someone was laughing somewhere, someone was running, a door closed. Everything sounded like it was in slow motion.
Itadori's back grew distant.
Nale gripped his notebook a little too tightly. He felt the corner of the paper pressing into his palm.
*(What did he just say?)*
The hallway's sound returned. The noise went back to normal speed. Nale took a step forward. Itadori was already far ahead. He wasn't waving or waiting. Just heading to the cafeteria. Maybe those words had been nothing to Itadori. Just a casual remark.
Nale put his notebook in his pocket and followed.
The number 68 felt much farther away than before.
---
Night fell.
Walking down the dormitory hallway, the door to room 102 opened just as he passed.
"Oh, Nale. Perfect timing"
Itadori was holding two juices. Both cold cans from a vending machine. One was offered toward Nale.
"Let's go to the roof. I said I'd buy you a juice, but I already got them"
"……You already have them"
"Well, that's that. Come on"
He had no real reason to refuse.
They climbed the stairs to the main building's roof side by side. The hallway was quiet at this hour. Exterior lights reflected off the window glass. As Nale accepted the juice, he realized he was still turning over Itadori's words from the afternoon hallway in the back of his mind.
Opening the roof door, autumn night air struck his face.
About one hundred fifty square meters of concrete surrounded by a fence. Two vending machines in the corner glowed dimly orange. To the east, the silhouette of the Tama mountains was visible. A few stars were out. His phone signal showed only two bars.
Nale had come here alone before. The night after EP1, after getting injured and unable to sleep, he'd stood drinking canned coffee and watching the night sky. That time he'd been alone. Now Itadori was here.
The two of them stood in front of the fence. Itadori opened his can, and Nale opened his. Apple flavor. Sweet. It felt right for tonight.
For a while, neither said anything. Strangely, the silence wasn't heavy. With Itadori, silence never felt burdensome. He'd known that for a long time.
"You know, Nale"
Itadori spoke while gazing up at the night sky.
"You're always there beside me"
He didn't seem to be putting any special emotion into it. Just speaking what came to mind—that was the tone of his voice. Eyes still on the night sky. Back lit by the vending machine's glow.
The can tilted in Nale's hand.
He quickly gripped it again. Nothing spilled. But his fingertips were trembling slightly.
*(——Ah)*
He understood.
It took shape, clearly.
This wasn't trust between comrades. The reason those words—that this guy made him feel at ease, that he was always there beside him—cut so deeply had only one explanation.
He liked this guy.
For real. Truly.
Something pulsed strongly in his chest. His heartbeat echoed all the way to his ears. His vision grew hot. The apple juice can was cold in his hand. That coldness felt strangely welcome now.
"What's wrong?"
Itadori turned toward him. Leaning in to look. The distance was close.
"Your face is red"
He said it from point-blank range. Itadori's eyes were looking straight at him. Warm brown eyes, worried. They were almost close enough to meet.
"……Might be catching a cold"
The words came out. He was surprised at how normal they sounded.
"I'm going back first"
He headed for the door. Walking, he didn't look back.
"Huh, wait——"
Itadori's voice reached his back, but Nale didn't stop.
---
Back in his room——105——he closed the door. Turned the lock. Turned on the light.
He collapsed onto the bed and pulled the blanket over his head.
His face was burning. In the darkness under the blanket, he exhaled.
*(This is the worst)*
He didn't want to think about it, but his mind started organizing things on its own. The worst reality stacked up, piece by piece.
First——Itadori was male. Nale was male too.
Second——Itadori was kind to everyone. When he said "I feel at ease when you're beside me," he might say the same thing to Megumi and Nobara. He was that kind of guy. Kind to everyone as naturally as breathing. Warm to everyone.
And then——his cursed energy output was 68. Fushiguro's was 97. Itadori's was unmeasurable. That was the world he lived in.
*(Why me?)*
It was more of a question. Where had this come from? When had it started? Had he not noticed because Itadori had been beside him since the first day? Did all those moments connect back to that night when he'd almost died and Itadori's face had floated in his mind?
Under the blanket, he covered his face with both hands.
If this feeling was discovered——everything would change. He couldn't walk beside him anymore. Couldn't go to the cafeteria together. Couldn't practice side by side in the Box. Couldn't stand together on that roof, in front of those vending machines.
*(I'll suppress it. That's all)*
He decided.
He could have the feeling, but he wouldn't show it. He was already good at that. He wouldn't tell anyone. Not Itadori, not Megumi, not Nobara. Just be beside him. That was all. As long as he could be beside him, that would be enough.
He pulled his face out from under the blanket.
The room was quiet. From beyond the wall, there was a faint presence. The wall next door was room 103——Megumi's room. Room 102 was……not in the direction of Nale's room along the hallway, but across it, wasn't it?
Wait.
He tried to remember the dormitory layout. The male dorm had rooms lined up on both sides of the hallway. Room 102 was on the right side of the hallway, room 105 on the left.
But.
In the silence of the entire dormitory, there was a faint sense of movement somewhere. Whether it was Itadori, he couldn't tell. But if he'd come back from the roof, he should be back in room 102 by now——
His heart jumped.
*(Just go to sleep)*
Nale closed his eyes.
He'd made his decision. He'd decided to suppress his feelings. But that decision already had holes in it. Just sensing someone's presence beyond the wall made his chest noisy again.
The autumn night deepened quietly.
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