When Saku wakes in a hospital bed with no memory of the past three years, the world feels like a stranger's—except for the row of cherry trees along the Meguro River, which stir something deep in his chest. He doesn't know why the falling petals feel like a promise. He doesn't know why the kind colleague who visits him with a bouquet of cherry branches seems to be holding back tears behind his smile.
Minato has spent three years loving Saku in secret. Now, standing at the edge of a spring that
Don't Forget, the Continuation of Spring - Two Pillows—The Continuation of a Lost Spring
The night city was quieter than he'd expected.
The December air bit cold, and every time he ran, pain stabbed deep into his lungs. Still, Saku didn't stop. In his coat's inner pocket, the diary pressed its hard corner against his chest. The weight of his own handwriting from three years ago pushed him forward.
(I want to see Minato.)
(I want to see him, and tell him properly.)
He sprinted along the road by the Meguro River. The city lights shattered into fine pieces on the water's surface, trembling. In spring, cherry blossoms would bloom along this row of trees—but now the bare branches cast only black shadows. Somewhere far off, an ambulance siren wailed faintly.
Minato's apartment was in a residential neighborhood one street in from the river. A small three-story building. The outer staircase's railing was painted white, floating dimly in the streetlight. Third floor, corner unit. A light was on in the window.
(He's there.)
Saku steadied his breathing. His shoulders rose and fell. His breath came out white. His heart pounded against the inside of his chest at a speed that wasn't just from running.
(That rainy day, I ran out of Minato's apartment.)
(Saying "I trusted you.")
(Minato started to say something, then stopped.)
(What Minato was trying to say then.)
(And what was written in the diary.)
He started up the outer stairs. The iron steps rang dry and hollow with each footfall—kan, kan. Just a little more to the third floor. The door drew closer.
(It's okay.)
(It's okay.)
He stood before the door. Two deep breaths. Then, with trembling fingers, he pressed the intercom.
A foolish electronic chime rang into the night's silence. A few seconds of quiet. Behind the door, a small sound. Then, slowly, the door opened.
"...Saku?"
His short black hair was slightly mussed, and his dark brown eyes were wide. Still in his loungewear, Minato stood frozen with his hand on the doorknob.
(Ah. It's Minato.)
(The person I wanted to see.)
"...Sorry. This is sudden."
His voice shook a little.
"...Why are you here?"
Minato's voice was hoarse. On his face were surprise, and a sliver of fear. His fingertips unconsciously touched the leather bracelet on his right wrist.
"Can I come in?"
When Saku said it, looking straight into his eyes, Minato hesitated for a moment, then slowly opened the door.
The sound of shoes coming off at the entryway. The rustle of a coat being removed. Saku stood facing Minato.
"Minato."
"...What?"
Minato looked away. That rainy night, he had lied to Saku. He'd said the two keys were for his company locker. He'd pretended to know nothing about the viewing application. Saku had been hurt by it and left.
(I betrayed Saku.)
(And now that Saku is here—why?)
Guilt and a faint hope churned in a whirlpool inside him.
"Minato. After I left your apartment, I kept thinking."
Saku began to speak quietly.
"What you were hiding. Why you looked so pained and said nothing. I couldn't understand it."
Minato listened in silence.
"But I figured it out. At my parents' house, I found a diary from three years ago."
Minato's shoulders twitched.
"It was written in there. About you. About the three years I spent with you. And about the day of the accident."
Saku's voice was low, but clear.
"I was your lover, wasn't I."
Minato caught his breath. He bit his lip.
"...That's right."
His voice was trembling.
"We were lovers. Three years ago, until you had your accident."
The truth he'd kept hidden for three years. The day he'd smiled and lied to Saku, calling himself a coworker. The spring when he'd decided to start over as a new relationship, with Saku's memories still gone. The autumn when Souichirou told him, "You were arguing with Saku on the day of the accident." The rainy night when Saku said "I trusted you," and he couldn't chase after him. All of it, all of it, had pooled inside Minato.
"...I'm sorry. For hiding it all this time."
Minato bowed his head.
"When I realized you'd lost your memories and didn't know me, I got scared. I thought if I told you we were lovers, it would only trouble you. So I lied and said we were coworkers."
His voice shook.
"When you fell in love with me again, I was happy. So happy. But at the same time, I felt guilty. You didn't remember a single thing about our three years together. Only I remembered everything. Only I was suffering."
Minato raised his head.
"...I'm sorry. I couldn't tell you anything. When you said you'd trusted me, I couldn't even chase after you. I'm the worst."
Tears welled in Minato's eyes.
"...Minato."
Saku took a step closer.
"I'm sorry too."
"...Huh?"
"It was in the diary. About the day of the accident. How you told me 'Don't push yourself.' And I pretended to be angry about it."
Saku looked straight into Minato's eyes.
"The truth is, I was really happy. Because I knew you were worried about me. But I couldn't say it honestly. I said something cruel—'It's none of your business, Minato.'"
His voice trembled, just slightly.
"So maybe what you were trying to say that rainy night—maybe it was about that."
Minato shook his head.
"...No. What I was trying to say was something else."
"Something else?"
"I wanted to tell you, Saku. 'I wanted to stay by your side, always.'"
Minato's voice was wet with tears.
"For three years, I wanted to stay by your side. But I couldn't say it. Because you didn't remember me. Because I'd lied and said I was just a coworker. I thought I had no right to be beside you."
A single tear spilled down Minato's cheek.
"But the truth is, I always wanted to be beside you. I wanted to be with you, Saku."
Minato's voice caught.
"I'm sorry, Saku. I always, always wanted to be beside you."
Saku felt something tighten deep in his chest.
(Minato carried this feeling alone for three years.)
(He couldn't tell me. Because I didn't remember.)
(And still, he stayed by my side.)
Saku gently took hold of Minato's arm. Minato's body gave a small start.
"Minato. I can't remember everything."
Saku looked straight into Minato's eyes.
"Reading the diary, I understood that I loved you. That I was going to live with you. But those feelings from back then haven't come back to me as memories yet."
Minato listened silently.
"Even so—I love you, Minato."
Minato's eyes went wide.
"Even without the memories, my heart remembers you. Reading the diary made me want to know you better. Made me want to be with you more."
Saku gripped Minato's arm tighter.
"So please. I want us to start over."
Saku's voice was earnest.
"I want to be beside you, Minato. Just like you said you always wanted to be beside me—I want to be beside you too."
Minato stared at Saku's face. Chestnut hair. Bright brown eyes. The small silver piercing in his left ear. The tips of his ears, which turned red when his emotions ran high.
(Saku wants to be beside me.)
(Even without his memories, he loves me.)
Deep in Minato's chest, something that had been locked tight for three years crumbled with a sound.
(Ah. I—)
(This person—I love him so much.)
Minato buried his face in Saku's chest.
"...Saku."
He clung to Saku's body.
"Saku, Saku, Saku."
He called the name over and over. The tears wouldn't stop. The loneliness he'd carried alone for three years burst forth the moment it touched Saku's warmth, like a dam breaking.
"I want to be beside you too. Always, always beside you."
Still buried against Saku's chest, he spoke in a shaking voice.
"Even if you lose your memories, I love you. Three years ago, and now, and always."
Saku held Minato tight.
"...Yeah. I love you too, Minato."
He wrapped his arms around Minato's back. Minato's body was thinner than he'd expected, and trembling.
(Minato was trembling alone for three years.)
(He couldn't tell me. Because I didn't remember.)
Saku pressed his cheek against Minato's hair. It was soft, with the faint scent of shampoo.
"Minato. At the end of the diary, there were unfinished words."
"'So—' And then nothing. Nothing after that was written."
Minato listened, face still buried in Saku's chest.
"I want to say the rest with my own mouth."
Saku pulled back slightly and looked straight into his eyes.
"So—"
A breath.
"—from now on, I'll be beside you, Minato."
Tears spilled from Minato's eyes again.
(Saku said it.)
(The continuation of the diary—Saku said it in his own words.)
(That he'll be beside me.)
Minato gripped Saku's hand tight.
"...Thank you, Saku."
"I'll be beside you too. I'll never leave."
The two held each other for a while. The silence of the December night filled the room. Outside the window, the wind stirred the trees. The faint sound of a car passing somewhere distant.
---
Eventually they sat side by side on the sofa. It was a little cramped with both of them. Saku leaned gently against Minato's shoulder.
"...Minato, you're warm."
"...You're warm too, Saku."
Minato rested his hand on Saku's head. The soft hair slipped between his fingers.
(I remember this feeling.)
(Three years ago, I touched Saku's hair just like this.)
Minato closed his eyes.
"Hey, Minato."
"Hm?"
"I want to live with you."
Minato's heart gave a leap.
"It was in the diary too. That I viewed an apartment so we could live together."
Saku looked up at Minato's face.
"Is that place still available?"
Minato gazed into Saku's eyes.
(Saku wants to live together.)
(In that apartment.)
(Me and Saku, together.)
Minato nodded slowly.
"...It's available. The contract's still in place."
He stood and took an envelope from the shelf in the living room. Inside were two silver keys and a single sheet of paper. The viewing application.
Minato held it out to Saku.
"...Let's live here. You and me."
His voice was shaking. But it wasn't the shaking of sorrow anymore.
"That place gets great sunlight, and the kitchen is spacious. You laughed and said you wanted to cook there."
Minato spoke while gazing at the application.
"Back then, you looked so happy. And I was happy too. I thought we'd build our life together in that apartment."
He raised his head.
"So, Saku. Let's go to that apartment together, one more time."
Saku gently took the silver key from Minato's hand. Cold, and heavy.
(This is Minato's and my future.)
(The key to living together, the two of us.)
Saku clutched the key tight.
"...Yeah. Let's go, Minato."
His voice was bright and buoyant.
---
The next day, the two visited the apartment. A ten-minute walk from the Meguro River, a relatively new building. Third floor, corner unit. Minato inserted the key, and with a click, the door opened.
Inside was empty. No furniture, nothing. White walls. Pale brown flooring. The weak winter sunlight streamed through the window, dimly illuminating the empty room.
"...Wow."
Saku stepped forward. His footsteps echoed faintly in the empty space.
"Minato, this place is great. The sunlight is amazing."
He stood by the window and looked outside.
"...Yeah. You can see the Meguro River from here. In spring, the cherry blossoms are beautiful."
Minato stood beside Saku. Their shadows stretched long across the empty floor.
"We'll put the sofa here. The bookshelf over there. In the kitchen, we'll line up the dishes we picked out together."
He spoke while surveying the room.
"The bookshelf! There's still one we haven't assembled. It's at your place, right?"
"...Ah, yeah. The one we bought together."
He smiled, a little embarrassed.
"Let's bring it here. And assemble it together."
"...Yeah. Let's assemble it together."
Seeing Saku's smile, Minato felt a gentle warmth spread through his chest.
(Ah. I love this person's smile.)
(Three years ago, and now—it hasn't changed.)
Minato held out the viewing application to Saku.
"Saku. This is the contract. I want you to write your name here."
Saku took the document. There was a field for the tenant's name.
"Let's write both our names here. Together, we'll become
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