The Cursed Gender Swap: My Fiancées Are All Men?! The Assassin Noble Luge's Hellish Rom-Com
Rugh Touahade has a problem. Several, actually.
First: he's the heir to an assassin noble house, secretly handling the kingdom's dirty work while maintaining a polite public face. Second: he's been reincarnated from a past life as an organization's assassin, which honestly explains more about his personality than he'd like to admit. Third: as of this morning, every woman in his domain has turned into a man—including Dia, his childhood friend and magic teacher, who is currently sobbing on the fl
The Cursed Gender Swap: My Fiancées Are All Men?! The Assassin Noble Luge's Hellish Rom-Com - Even after becoming a man, Master still wants to wear a skirt.
The carriage wheels made a soft sound against the cobblestones.
Rugh Touahade sat with his eyes closed on the swaying seat. The carriage had passed through the heart of the Vermina Barony and was now traveling the highway toward the royal capital of Alvain. Out the window, wheat fields and vineyards stretched endlessly under the summer sun.
"...Hey, Rugh."
At the sound of her voice, Rugh opened his eyes.
Dia sat in the seat across from him. Long silver hair. Violet eyes. That face belonged to Dia Vicone—the girl Rugh had known since childhood.
But her body was different.
Broad shoulders, a flat chest, and an Adam's apple at her throat. It was a man's body. Dia, who had certainly been a woman until yesterday morning, now had the body of a man.
"I still can't believe it. Every time I look in the mirror, it's like someone else is staring back."
Dia stared at her own hands. They were much larger than before, the fingers thick.
"...You'll just have to get used to it. We still don't know what's behind this curse."
"It IS a curse! It has to be! I mean, me turning into a man—that can't be anything but a failed spell or a curse!"
Dia's voice rose. A man's body, a woman's tone.
Rugh sighed.
(...Right. This is a mess.)
It was a habit of his—a kind of mantra. The memories of his past life—when he'd lived as an assassin for an organization in a world called Earth—always surfaced in his mind like a spell to keep himself calm.
He sorted through the situation.
First, there was nothing wrong with his own body. Still an eighteen-year-old man. Short black hair, deep brown eyes, five foot eight. The assassin crest of the Touahade family on the back of his right hand, a small silver piercing in his left ear. Same as always.
But Dia was different.
And not just Dia. All over the Vermina Barony, people were switching sexes. The village innkeeper's wife had become a man; the blacksmith's master had become a woman. The whole domain was in chaos.
On top of that, a letter had arrived at the manor's parlor. The sender was listed only as "the Goddess." It read:
*It just happened by chance. If you wish to return to normal, then confess your true love.*
Rugh remembered reading it.
(A true love confession...? What is that supposed to mean?)
He hadn't understood it at all.
But there was no point dwelling on it now. First, they would go to Arcadia, the Royal Academy of Magic in the capital, and investigate the curse. That was the priority.
"Dia, how's the Star-Reading Compass?"
Dia touched the silver bracelet around her left wrist—the proof of her starlight-kin bloodline. Then she drew out the small compass hanging at her hip.
"...It's not moving."
Dia's voice suddenly went quiet.
"The Star-Reading Compass is a tool that reads the arrangement of the stars. A star-reading mage uses it to borrow the power of the stars. But right now the needle won't budge. I can't read the positions of the stars at all."
"So you can't use star-reading magic?"
"...That's what it comes down to. At least, not with my power."
Dia stared at the compass. Her violet eyes wavered with sadness.
"There aren't any texts on gender-disruption magic either—not that I know of. The Royal Academy's library only has a few theoretical research papers. In all of recorded history, there's never been a single successful case of a spell that actually swaps someone's sex."
"...I see."
"I'm supposed to be your teacher... I thought I knew everything there was to know about magic, and I don't understand any of this. It kills me that I can't be useful to you, Rugh..."
Dia hung her head. In a man's body, her shoulders trembled.
Rugh looked at her.
(Dia's always been like this. When I'm in trouble, she grieves like it's her own problem.)
A small ache pricked at his chest.
"...You are useful. Just having you here helps me."
"Huh?"
Dia lifted her face.
"You're my teacher. Even without the magical knowledge, just having you beside me keeps me calm. ...So don't make that face."
Rugh looked straight into Dia's eyes as he spoke.
Dia's mouth fell open. Then, slowly, she smiled.
"...Honestly. You've always been like that, Rugh—always spoiling me."
"I'm not spoiling you. I just said the truth."
"Fufu. That's exactly what I mean. That side of you, Rugh, I—"
Dia stopped short.
"...?"
"N-nothing! Anyway, look—look outside! We're almost at the village!"
Dia hurriedly pointed out the window. In a man's body, her cheeks flushed red.
Rugh tilted his head.
(...What was she about to say?)
When it came to matters of love, he was hopelessly clumsy. It wasn't that he was insensitive to others' feelings. If anything, he overthought everything until he spun in circles.
So even now, he found himself turning over the rest of Dia's sentence.
(No—don't overthink it. The curse investigation comes first.)
Rugh turned his gaze out the window.
The carriage was approaching a small village.
A crowd had gathered at the village entrance. Something seemed to be happening.
"...What's going on?"
"Let's get out and see."
The two of them stepped down from the carriage.
Villagers had gathered in the village square, all wearing bewildered expressions.
At the center of it all, an elderly couple was arguing.
"I'm your husband! What are you saying!"
The one shouting was a white-haired old man. But his body was unmistakably a woman's—narrow waist, full chest.
"What are YOU talking about! You're my wife! Look in a mirror, for heaven's sake!"
The one shouting back was a petite old woman. But her body was unmistakably a man's—broad shoulders, a beard on her face.
Rugh understood the situation.
(These two had their sexes swapped too.)
"So the grandpa became the grandma, and the grandma became the grandpa..."
Dia murmured beside Rugh.
"So it wasn't just me. Thank goodness... or is that something to be thankful for?"
Dia's expression turned complicated.
Just then, one of the villagers noticed Dia.
"Hey, you. Are you a man or a woman?"
Dia flinched.
"Huh? I—I'm a woman. Even if my body's turned out like this."
"Hah? A woman? In that body? You've gotta be kidding."
"Were you really a woman? Or were you a man from the start?"
The villagers crowded in on Dia. Curious stares pierced through her.
Dia took a step back. In a man's body, her face looked ready to burst into tears.
"Th-that's not true. Until yesterday I was properly a woman. I looked in the mirror and even I was shocked..."
"Suspicious. Maybe you're a man pretending to be a woman?"
"Stop it! What do any of you know about me?! I'm a woman! My heart and my soul are still a woman's!"
Dia shouted.
Her voice was trembling.
Rugh stepped in front of her.
"...That's enough. This person is my teacher. Whether she's a man or a woman isn't the issue here. Don't be rude."
Rugh spoke quietly. But his voice carried an edge that left no room for argument.
The villagers faltered under his sharp gaze.
"Wh-what are you..."
"I'm of the Touahade family. This village is part of the Vermina Barony too. Did you think I'd stand by and watch a member of the lord's house be insulted by his own people?"
Rugh casually showed the assassin crest on the back of his right hand.
The villagers stirred uneasily.
"The Touahade family... the martial instructors..."
"I-I'm sorry! I spoke out of line!"
The villagers bowed their heads and scattered.
Dia stood staring at Rugh's back.
"...Rugh."
"Are you all right?"
Rugh turned around.
Dia gave a small nod. But tears had pooled in her eyes.
"...I never thought it would hurt this much—not being treated as a woman, even after I turned into a man."
Dia spoke in a small voice.
"It's only natural, isn't it? A girl becomes a boy's body, and she still wants to live as a girl. ...But no one understands. Everyone thinks that once your body's a man, you're not a woman anymore."
"...Dia."
"Am I not even allowed to wear a skirt in this body? Is it wrong for me to want to stay a girl?"
Dia's tears spilled over. In a man's body, she wept.
Rugh couldn't find the words.
(...What should I say?)
(Do I really understand what Dia's feeling?)
Rugh took her hand.
"...You are you. Even if your body changes, Dia is Dia. That's what I believe."
Dia stared at Rugh's hand.
"...Thank you, Rugh."
Dia wiped her tears.
"Come on, let's go. The capital's still a ways off."
Dia forced a smile. In a man's body—but that smile was the same gentle one as always.
The two of them returned to the carriage.
The carriage set off again.
Outside the window, wheat fields spread beneath the summer sun.
"...Hey, Rugh."
"What?"
"I think I really do want to wear a skirt. Even in this body, I'm going to find a skirt I can wear."
"...I see."
"Yes! There are plenty of big tailors in the capital, right? I'll have one custom-make a skirt that fits a man's body! And then, Rugh, will you help me pick it out?"
Dia's eyes sparkled.
Rugh couldn't help but smile wryly.
(...She was crying just a moment ago, and she's already bounced back.)
(That part of her hasn't changed either.)
"...Yeah. I'll come along."
"Yay! It's a promise!"
Dia clung to Rugh's arm. In a man's body.
"...Dia. You're close. It's hot. Let go."
"Huh? Oh—sorry! It's just force of habit..."
Dia hurriedly pulled away. Her face was bright red.
(...Force of habit, huh.)
Rugh muttered inwardly.
Dia had always had a habit of clinging to Rugh's arm whenever she was happy. It seemed the habit from her girlhood hadn't faded, even in a man's body.
(...Troublesome. In all sorts of ways.)
Rugh turned his eyes out the window.
The royal capital of Alvain was close now.
The castle gates of Alvain were more clamorous than usual.
"...What's that?"
Rugh looked out the carriage window at the scene before the gates.
Guards were stopping each passerby one by one, checking something.
"Show me your identification! And declare your sex!"
"My sex?! I'm a man, obviously—look at me!"
"A man in that body? Don't lie. You're a woman. Show me your family register."
"My register says male! My body just changed on its own! Until yesterday I was properly a man!"
"Yeah, yeah. They all say that. Anyway, anyone whose register doesn't match their body, line up over there."
A long line had formed before the gates. People whose sexes had swapped were explaining their situations to the guards.
"...The capital's in chaos too, it seems."
Dia murmured anxiously.
"...Yeah."
It took quite a while for the carriage to get through the gates.
Once they finally entered Alvain, the city inside was just as chaotic as outside.
At the storefronts in the commercial district, merchants whose sexes had swapped were arguing with customers.
"I'm telling you, I was the proprietress until yesterday! Then I wake up this morning like this! What am I supposed to do about the sign that says 'The Proprietress's Shop'?!"
"How should I know? I just want to buy bread."
"We're still selling bread! Just because the proprietress is a man doesn't change how the bread tastes!"
"Nah, bread made by a man just feels wrong."
"What did you say?! You little—!"
Rugh sighed.
(...It's like this everywhere.)
"...Let's hurry. We're going to the academy."
"Yes."
The two headed for Arcadia, the Royal Academy of Magic.
The Royal Academy of Magic, Arcadia, stood in the northwest of Alvain. A stone main building, a library boasting twenty thousand volumes, an experimental wing equipped with protective wards for magical experiments, and separate men's and women's dormitories. Around eight hundred students and fifty teachers. The foremost institution for star-reading magic research.
Rugh was a student there himself—top of Class S at the Royal Knight Academy. Dia was an adjunct lecturer.
When the two passed through the academy gates, the commotion inside was beyond anything outside.
"Waaaaah! My uniform! I can't wear the skirt!"
"Why are you in the
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