My Youth Romantic Comedy Is Wrong, As I Expected. IF ~Yukinoshita Asks One More Time~ - A Holy Night Confession, and the Chosen Ice Queen

Christmas Eve. By the time the clock passed eight in the evening, Hikigaya Hachiman was lying on his back on the bed in his room. Staring at the grain of the ceiling, he repeatedly turned the smartphone in his right hand on and off. Every time the screen went dark, his own stupid face reflected back at him from the black glass. (What the hell am I doing?) Two months since returning from Kyoto. Since the morning after the school trip, when Yuigahama Yui had walked away from the two of them with a smile on her face, that thin glass wall had returned between him and Yukinoshita Yukino. No, to be precise, he was the one who had built the wall. Yui's crying face was still burned into the back of his eyelids. That night, in the inn's back garden, Yui had squeezed out her true feelings. She had always liked Hachiman. She loved Yukino too, so she had kept quiet about it. And what had he answered, receiving those words? He hadn't been able to answer. He had no right to answer. (A way for the three of us to stay together without hurting both of them—it really never existed, after all.) A conclusion he had repeated in his head countless times. And yet, tonight, he was about to go to Yukinoshita's apartment. He sat up from the bed. He grabbed the black duffle coat tossed in the corner of the room. Wearing it over pajamas was, no matter how he thought about it, questionable. No, but if he just wore it, it would work out somehow. It was a night road anyway. "……Hah." A sigh leaked from his mouth. When he went down to the living room, his little sister Komachi was eating mandarin oranges at the kotatsu. A Christmas special was playing on the TV. Glittering illuminations and footage of happy-looking couples. The perfect screen for escaping reality. The moment Komachi saw how he was dressed, she forcefully swallowed the mandarin in her mouth. "Onii-chan! Don't tell me you're going out? On this holy night, when you're normally a dead-serious, twisted loner!?" "Shut up. What kind of creature do you think I am?" He answered curtly as he put on his sneakers at the entryway. Komachi crawled out from the kotatsu and chased him to the door. "Hey, onii-chan. You're going to Yukino-san's place, right?" "……How can you tell?" "Because if onii-chan is going out to meet someone on his own, it's either Yukino-san or Yui-san. And the face you're making right now—if I had to say—it's the face you make when you're going to see Yukino-san." "That makes no sense." He put his hand on the doorknob. From behind him, Komachi said quietly: "Onii-chan, do your best." Without looking back, he waved a hand lazily and stepped out the door. Outside, it wasn't as cold as he'd expected. Along the prefectural road leading to Inage Station, the street trees decorated since last night sparkled and twinkled. White and blue lights faintly illuminated the sidewalk. Couples and families passed by, laughing happily. (On Christmas, just where in the world is there a high schooler going alone to confess?) He tried to laugh self-deprecatingly, then stopped. He couldn't laugh. His phone vibrated in his pocket. He opened the screen. A message from Yui. "Tomorrow, let's have a Christmas party, okay? The three of us, one last time." "One last time." Those three words pierced his retinas. Yui had already made up her mind. She was trying to end the three of them being together—no, to end those days when the three of them had been together—with her own hands. That was exactly why she intended to get through that final time together with a smile. (You're always like that.) Protecting yourself with kind lies, killing yourself, wishing only for others' happiness. That was the kind of woman Yuigahama Yui was. But he— He had already stopped telling lies. He closed the screen and shoved the phone into his pocket. His walking speed increased, just a little. Yukinoshita's apartment was about an eight-minute walk from Kemigawahama Station in Mihama Ward. Twelfth floor of a fifteen-story building. The entrance was glass-walled, and the auto-lock intercom glared at visitors. He stood in front of the building, unable to move for several seconds. (I can still turn back now.) Somewhere in his head, his weak self whispered. (Tomorrow, I could show up for the "last time together" that Yui prepared, and then just end everything. No one gets hurt. No one cries. But is that really fine?) Don't be stupid. An ending where no one gets hurt never existed from the start. He swallowed, and punched the room number into the auto-lock panel. The call tone rang. Twice. Three times. Ten-odd seconds of silence. No answer. (Not home? No, she just hasn't noticed the intercom.) He rang again. This time, there was an immediate response. "……Yes." The voice through the speaker was thin and hoarse. "It's me. Hikigaya." Silence. About five seconds. "……I'll open up." A click—the sound of the lock releasing. He pushed open the lobby door and stepped into the elevator. Twelfth floor. He walked down the corridor and stood before the room. The moment he reached for the intercom, the door opened from inside. "……" Yukinoshita Yukino stood there. Her glossy black hair, reaching down to her waist, was neatly arranged as always. But her face was visibly haggard, and her blue eyes were red and bloodshot. She wore a white knit cardigan over her loungewear. Even so, her back was straight. Straight, and yet she looked like she might collapse at any moment. His breath caught for a second. "……I knew you'd come. If it's you." She murmured that, then held out the smartphone in her hand toward him. He looked at the screen. A message from Yukinoshita Haruno. "Congratulations. But can you pay the price?" Just one line. The moment he saw it, something hot surged up from the pit of his stomach. "……Since when have you had that?" "Last night. Do you understand what it means?" "I understand. It means your sister is testing you, right? Testing whether I'm a man worthy of her little sister." Yukinoshita's shoulders trembled. He remained standing outside the entryway. He didn't step even one foot into Yukinoshita's room. (Why am I always like this?) He couldn't bring himself to follow the normal flow of "Should I come in?" No—he felt he mustn't. If he entered her room here, his words would cloud over. He'd be swept along by the half-hearted atmosphere. So, in front of the entryway. Here and now. He would say everything. "Yukinoshita." Yukinoshita slowly raised her face. "I'm bad with words. I might not be able to convey this well. So I'll only say it once. Listen carefully." Her blue eyes fixed squarely on him. "I want to be by your side. It has to be Yukinoshita Yukino. If you're about to break, I'll support you. If you make a mistake, I'll stop you. That's my justice." Each syllable, deliberately separated. His own voice was, surprisingly even to himself, not trembling. Yukinoshita's eyes widened. From her blue eyes, a single tear spilled over. "I've…… wanted to hear those words, for so long." She covered her mouth with her own hand. Her shoulders heaved violently. Her suppressed sobs dissolved into the silence of the entryway. "……But, is it really okay? With me?" Yukinoshita squeezed out the words in a voice wet with tears. "What about Yuigahama-san…… what about her feelings?" Yui's name. In that instant, a dull pain shot through his chest. The face of Yui, confessing through tears on the night of the school trip. The woman who had protected herself with kind lies. Choosing Yukinoshita without hurting her—it was impossible. He knew that. He knew it, and that was exactly why he was standing here now. "I can't answer Yui's feelings." He said it clearly. "It's only you." The moment she heard those words, Yukinoshita collapsed on the spot. As if the strength had drained from her knees. She crouched down, clutching her small body. Tears dripped from her wet eyes, staining the tiles of the entryway. "That's not fair…… you're always, always like this……" He wrapped his arms around her shoulders. Cold wind blew in through the half-open door. The December night air brushed against his back. He seriously thought: if only time could stop like this. How long had they stayed like that? From the apartment corridor, he heard footsteps running toward them. Patter, patter. No—more urgent, faster footsteps. Not from the elevator, but racing up the stairs. He raised his head. "……Hah, hah…… hah……" Yuigahama Yui appeared from around the corner of the corridor. Her bright brown semi-long hair was plastered to her forehead with sweat. The flower pin on the right side. Her large eyes were wet with tears. "Hikki…… Yukinon……" Gasping for breath, she looked at the two of them. Yukinoshita collapsed on the ground, and him holding her shoulders. Yui stared at that scene. "……I thought you'd come." Her voice was trembling. "Hikki, I knew you'd definitely go to Yukinon's place today." Yui took a step closer to them. "Why…… why didn't you tell me first……" It wasn't anger. "I've been…… trying so hard, all this time, so the three of us could stay together……" Yui's voice went hoarse and broke off. "I could have told Yukinon too, if I'd wanted to…… but I was scared, and I couldn't say anything…… and then Hikki, you went first……" Yukinoshita was still trembling in his arms. He couldn't move. Yui's words pierced his chest, one by one. (Ah, I see.) Yui was lonely. It wasn't that he'd beaten her to it, or that Yukinoshita had taken him. While she couldn't say anything, the two of them had moved forward and left her behind. Being left behind—that was what was unbearably lonely. "I…… was being unfair. I pretended not to see what was happening between you two, and I thought if I just kept smiling, someday the three of us could stay together. But that…… that was hurting you both, wasn't it." Tears ran down Yui's cheeks. But she smiled. Crying, she forced herself to make a smile. "Yukinon, congratulations." Yukinoshita raised her face. "Take care of Hachiman…… okay?" That smile was more painfully fragile than any smile he had ever seen. He gripped Yukinoshita's hand. Bony, cold fingers. He didn't let go. "Hachiman." Yukinoshita called his name in a tear-wet voice. "I'm going to cry for myself this time." Yui said, wiping her tears. "And then I'll be able to choose for myself properly. So…… just like Sensei told me, I'll just watch over you two from now on." Sensei? Yui took an envelope out of her pouch. A white envelope. He immediately knew what it was. "I got this from Hiratsuka-sensei yesterday." Yui took the contents out of the envelope. A request form for the Service Club. In the entry field, written in messy handwriting: "Request: Please help Yuigahama Yui become able to cry for her own sake." The requester: Yuigahama Yui. "……Sensei gave this to Yui-san……" Yukinoshita stared at the envelope, speechless. He was speechless too. Hiratsuka Shizuka—had she known everything? From the night before the culture festival, when he had stood frozen, helpless. From the night of the school trip, when Yui had cried. Up to today, when he would come here. This woman, as the Service Club's advisor, had simply watched over them in silence. Whether to intervene or not—she hadn't misjudged that line by a single step. "……So this is my first and last request." Yui's voice was serious. "Will you accept it? Hikki. Yukinon." He was silent for a while. For a moment, the strength drained from Yukinoshita's hand. But he gripped that hand even tighter. "……It's a bit late for that, don't you think?" A voice squeezed out. "Putting up with your selfishness isn't something that started today. You even went and submitted a request form—did you think I'd refuse now?" Yui's eyes widened. Yukinoshita suddenly squeezed his hand back. "Yes. Let's accept it." Yukinoshita said, wiping away the tr

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Episode 7

Name: My Youth Romantic Comedy Is Wrong, As I Expected. IF ~Yukinoshita Asks One More Time~
Author: Novelia

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